Giving It Up

Are you like me? Do you have a "guilty stash" that you keep in your house, just in case? I do, and while its contents may vary depending on sales, my mood at the time I was in the store, and shelf life, my "guilty stash" is always there, sometimes on the very top shelf and sometimes displayed in plain view on top of my mini-fridge. I thought I would write about it tonight, though, because there is something I've been contemplating doing and I'm not sure I'm ready to do it yet.

See, I would like to completely get rid of my "guilty stash." Throw it out, eat it up, give it away, but once it's gone, it is gone for good. Now that is a scary thought. I'm not sure I can manage without it. What if I'm feeling stressed, sad, lonely, or angry? How will I console myself or feel good about myself? What if visitors drop by unexpectedly and expect a treat? What if I'm watching a movie and I suddenly feel like snacking, or I get a craving for a certain type of food?

My "guilty stash" this week includes 1/2 Toblerone bar (I've already eaten the other half), 1 big bag of salt and pepper potato chips (stuck on the very top shelf over the sink), 3 fig bars (they say natural, but I think each packet is 380 calories, and there's about 6 bites in each packet), a small jar of vegenaise, 6 tins of dolmades (not sure if they fall into this category, because they are healthy, but also drenched in oil), and a wide assortment of granola bars and crackers. I know, you're looking at my list and thinking, "What is she so worried about? I have twelve Reese's Whipps in my freezer so I won't eat them all once, a box of Costco brownies, 6 doughnuts, and a whole apple pie in a Trader Joe's paper bag in the corner of my closet." Well, unfortunately, I tend to overeat anything that isn't healthy for me, so it really makes no difference if it is a chocolate bar or a granola bar. Oh yes, and I've been there in your shoes as well. I've had all those foods on that second list of junk food and more, sitting in my room at one time.

So here's my thought. I am still gearing up emotionally to do this, but I've been thinking about it for some time now. I'd like to get rid of everything that isn't real food. You know exactly what I mean. Empty calories, substitutes for regular meals, consolation prizes. I can't eat it all first, because not only will I be putting on the pounds, once I've eaten the food, I will want to buy some more and the cycle will continue. My theory behind all of this rather frightening plan is that if I have only healthy food to eat in my house, I won't overeat. It's easy to eat 12 brownie bites in a row, but it isn't easy to eat a whole box of cherry tomatoes. After about 10 tomatoes, I start to feel full and my tastebuds are telling me I need to find something else to eat! Somehow I wonder if God made natural foods that way, so we would be healthier people.

I still have a day or two to think about it, but now that it's out there for everyone to read, I think I shall have to follow through. This could be really exciting!